For You.

I’m kind of in love with David Horvitz. At least the idea of the him on his website where he’ll do different things for you for set prices.

Some examples:

• If you give me $1,626 I will go to the small Okinawan island called Taketomi and send you an envelope filled with star-sand (don’t worry, I’ve been there before, I know where to go). I will send it from there.

• If you give me $3,143 I will for as far away as possible. I live in New York. I will go to Perth, Australia the farthest distance from New York on Earth. I will mail you a photograph of me standing in New York. I will then mail you a photograph of me standing in Perth. I’m a little sad right now and I would kind of like to escape, so if you are thinking about getting one of these and not sure what you want, please take in consideration my emotions and pick this one.

• If you give me $30 I will walk around New York, and the first homeless person I see I will buy him or her whatever he or she wants to eat (as long as it is less than $30). I will mail you back the exact change (minus the paypal fee and the cost of the postage stamp) with the receipt for the food and the name of the person who ate it.

:: via A Cup of Jo

  • karey m.

    April 29, 2008 at 8:05 pm Reply

    i love him. i love him. i love him.

  • Joker

    June 10, 2008 at 6:44 pm Reply

    For $26.32 I’ll buy a fruity cocktail, throw it in my own face and play a tape that says screw you manwhore when you have a nasty breakup.

    For $12.97 I’ll buy a pack of blank cd’s and label them Michael Bolton’s best contribution to life.

    For $13,456 I’ll take a two week cruise and take video clips screaming something like PACHANGAAAAA MALANGA in front of the US embassy in each of those countries.

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